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Wedding, Mom and Friend

Happy Friday the 13th!

Last night I spoke with a friend of mine in the States. I haven’t talked to her in … forever, it seems. I wanted to tell her about the wedding over the phone and invite her. Other than my family, she’s the only one from the States who I’d love to have at my wedding. Given the horrid economy in the States I’m not sure if she can come, but I’m keeping my fingers crossed.

And speaking of weddings — I had no idea how time consuming and expensive it is to have one in the first place. I’ve been to three wedding venues, and you can’t do a banquet for less than $150 / person. It’s uber-fancy 4 to 5 course French or French-Japanese fusion cuisine, but holy cow. (BTW — since this is Japan you get like two bites or so per course.) Of course you also have to pay for the thank-you-for-coming-to-my-wedding presents. Per one of my Japanese friends, you need to prepare three presents totaling $70-100 per person.

Mom is determined to buy ridiculously expensive and 100% impractical gifts for Hero Material’s family. I told her it was completely unnecessary, and that it’d only make them uncomfortable. Mom of course insisted that’s how you do things back home (meaning her native country), and I had to remind her that the wedding is in Japan, and Hero Material’s family is 100% American. Hero Material is flabbergasted since he doesn’t think it’s necessary, so I’m going to have to contact her again and tell her to hold off on the gift buying spree.

I think the real reason for Mom wanting to give presents to everyone, including yours truly, is because she wants something back in return. The first thing she told me after I announced my engagement was:

Hero Material loves kids. I’m sure he wants two children. Preferably as soon as possible. You know, you guys aren’t getting any younger.

BTW — do you have any tips for wedding planning and dealing with an overzealous (and overly excited) mother?

8 comments to “Wedding, Mom and Friend”

  1. May
    · March 13th, 2009 at 11:43 am · Link

    Uhm, get married and not tell anybody that you’ve gotten married?

    You sure don’t ask easy questions.

  2. susan
    · March 13th, 2009 at 1:22 pm · Link

    Um – well I had over zealous mother and mother in law!

    I used the the calender in brides magazine – they all have one yo can tear out… it is a helpful organizational tool. We managed a years worth of planning in about 6 months…

    • Nadia Lee
      · March 14th, 2009 at 12:20 am · Link

      I think I’ll get one of those. We’ve decided on our top 3 choices (for the wedding venues) so we want to see how much it’s going to cost and what the availabilities are.

  3. May
    · March 13th, 2009 at 9:39 pm · Link


    Was my suggestion that bad? Is that why you’re not talking to me any more?


    • Nadia Lee
      · March 14th, 2009 at 12:21 am · Link

      LOL. So. I was out all day looking at wedding venues. LOL.

      I can’t do that anyway. I’m gonna get disowned.

  4. May
    · March 15th, 2009 at 10:36 pm · Link

    Every time I suggest something, you tell me you will be disowned.

    But I’m sure it’ll be temporary…until you give your mama the two grandkids she so desperately desires.

  5. Elizabeth Loupas
    · March 17th, 2009 at 11:59 pm · Link

    Hi, Nadia! Thought I’d drop over here since we’ve “met” on LJ and Twitter.

    I’m afraid I’m not much help with wedding-planning advice… we got married at home with only eight guests, and I baked my own wedding cake (and very good it was, if I do say so myself). But a calendar-planner sounds like a great idea. Checklists are always good, too. Think of it kind of like plotting a novel. :)

    Many congratulations and good wishes to you and Hero Material!

  6. Nadia Lee
    · March 18th, 2009 at 12:15 am · Link

    May — I agree.

    Elizabeth — Hi! :)

    You know…we’re hiring a wedding machine…er…end-to-end wedding planning company. It’s just that my mom’s still convinced that she has to tell me what the wedding experts should be doing. >.<

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