Ava

I sip the steaming coffee as quickly as possible. My eyes feel like they’re packed with sand, and caffeine’s the only thing that will get me through this day. Faye and Lucas in each other’s arms kept popping up in my dreams, disturbing my sleep. They definitely had it off after going home. You don’t kiss like that unless you’re planning on more.

She’s with him because you didn’t fight for him.

Elizabeth’s words circle around my head. I imagine them as a halo of vultures waiting for my sanity to draw its last breath. The doubt she’s sown wants to feast on my pride, my sense of self-worth. And that’s about all I have left.

The first step to fixing a problem is admitting you have one. Well, obviously I have one—my inability to let go of Lucas. If he hadn’t shown me what we could have had together, then it wouldn’t hurt so much. After all, I survived the first time. But this second time was more… He made me hope for a shared future.

Your future does not have to have Lucas in it, I tell myself forcefully. I can date around, find some other man to love. Who says you can only love once? As a matter of fact, Jon might be the one—the man who could love me, who I could love back openly.

And to that end, it’s better that I make sure Lucas and his family don’t want anything to do with me. Elizabeth didn’t mention Mia just to be chatty. God, my head is a mess of jumbled thoughts and emotions. I have to pull myself together…or I’m going to do something to irreparably damage not only myself, but possibly Mia’s safety and future as well.

I finish the coffee and stand up to get a second serving before checking in with Robbie. Then I see…

Lucas.

The impact of his presence slices me like a scalpel down the belly. He’s stunning—scars or no—and he looks well rested and calm. Blood roars in my head, and my vision feels hazy for a moment. After what I saw at the opening, I’m not prepared to face him.

The expertly tailored button-down shirt and slacks—both in black—emphasize the breadth and leanness of his tall, strong body. Silver cufflinks wink when he checks his watch, and I shake my head, willing the apparition to vanish.

My heart thunders. What the hell is he doing here? Is he here to see me?

Part of me almost sobs in relief and need, even though my head tells me he’s probably here for something else. But if he does approach, I can’t be weak and crumble. I have to stick to what I told him in Virginia.

He stops two feet away. My mouth dries, bees buzzing in my stomach. I wish I hadn’t gulped down that first cup of coffee so fast.

“You’re Robbie’s assistant?”

This Lucas is nothing like the one I remember. His voice is neutral, and the rigid lines of his body say “hands off.” Under his cool, hard scrutiny, something inside me shrivels as though I’m the one who screwed up back in Charlottesville. “Yes.”

“Okay. Did he tell you you’ll be working with me to organize the year-end fundraiser event?”

“No. I haven’t had a chance to talk with him.”

Lucas’s gaze flicks over me, making me die inside. There’s zero warmth, zero recognition. This is what you wanted. It’s as though I’m a stranger.

“I was under the impression you would be up to speed,” he says.

“I just got in.”

“Had time to finish coffee.” He cocks the eyebrow.

My back stiffens. I’m not going to apologize for having a morning java. “We’ll go in together. I need to check a few things with him anyway.”

“Ladies first.”

He gestures me ahead. I can’t decide if this is a way of mocking me or not. I’m pretty sure “lady” isn’t the first word he associates with me.

I lead him to my boss’s office, all the while praying this is a prank or some kind of huge mistake. There is no way Lucas can be involved with the medical center. Google said he donates to causes, not that he gets down in the trenches himself.

Robbie smiles when he sees us walking in. “Thrilled you could join us today, Mr. Reed.”

“Glad to be here. And please, call me Lucas.” They shake hands.

“Have you met my assistant?” Robbie asks.

“We’ve met.” Lucas gestures at the seats. “Shall we get started?”

I hear the words between the two men, but my mind barely processes anything. The shock of seeing Lucas is still reverberating through me.

I don’t understand what he’s doing here. Why do we need him? Surely, there are other people—more famous people—who can draw in the crowds to benefit the medical center.

“That’s wonderful.” Robbie’s voice penetrates my miserable confusion. “I’m sorry I can’t be more involved. Operations is taking more of my time and effort than I expected. But I’m sure Ava will do a great job.”

I almost drop my pen. “What?”

Robbie frowns, while Lucas studies me like an insect on the other side of a magnifying glass. “Do you have some objection to the new task?” Lucas asks.

My internal sensor screams “trap.” I inhale and gather my thoughts before saying, “Not at all. I’m just surprised I’m the one who’s being tapped for it. I’ve never done this kind of work before.”

Maybe this will give me an excuse to bow out. I’m certain Lucas doesn’t want us to spend time together. He did everything possible to force me to take the money and give him the closure he said he needed to move on. Faye is the one in his life now.

So why does this hurt so much?

“First time for everything.” Robbie grins broadly. “I wouldn’t have picked you if I didn’t feel you were a quick study.”

I give him a weak smile in return.

“And whatever help I need, I’m sure my sister can deliver,” Lucas says. “She’s world class at this kind of stuff.”

“We’re grateful for your help,” Robbie says. “Both you and your family. I’ll make sure to adjust Ava’s work schedule so she can assist you and learn exactly what’s needed to pull an event like this together.”

“Excellent.” Lucas stands up. “Then let’s get started. I have a lunch meeting.”

I have no choice now. The only way I could possibly get out of this is by explaining my history with Lucas to Robbie, but I’d rather die than behave unprofessionally. I can handle this. It’s just one job, and the close contact with Lucas will be over soon enough.

Lucas and I move to a small meeting room, and he dictates a huge list of tasks. Not even once during that time does he regard me with anything other than cool detachment.

I’ve imagined it would be nearly impossible to handle if Lucas came back to me with love in his eyes and told me again that he wanted to be with me. But this coldness is so much worse. It is as though everything I suspected is true…that I don’t matter.

Every second fillets a little bit more of my heart. Even though I’m following along on autopilot, my head is full of contradictory thoughts and emotions.

What’s wrong with me? This stranger treatment is what I told him I wanted. I even put him through the “test” so he would realize the truth between us. But it still makes my heart ache.

Elizabeth words come back to me, this time with an undertone of accusation.

She’s with him because you didn’t fight for him.

But how can I fight for nothing?

I’m in love with you.

A last-ditch effort to get me to change my mind. He’d never said those words before. And there were plenty of opportunities.

Gifts. Words. They never mean anything. Just look how easily Dad threw them at me and Mom. And how gullible we were to take them at face value.

Finally, Lucas stops his dictation of tasks. “All that needs to be completed by close of business tomorrow. When you’re finished, let me know so we can move on to the next phase.”

I place my pen on the yellow legal pad full of scribbled to-do items. “Are you staying in L.A.?”

“For a while. The weather’s better, and my family’s here.”

There goes my hope that he’ll return to Charlottesville and we can work long distance.

“Let Robbie know if you can’t handle the work. I’m sure he can find me a suitable replacement.”

“A replacement… Is that what you want?”

Lucas studies me. “Isn’t it what you want?”

“I’m a professional. I can handle it.”

He smirks. “That would’ve been more convincing if you didn’t look like you were sucking on a lemon when you said it.” He gets up. “Don’t forget. COB tomorrow.”

The second the meeting room door closes, the charge in the air vanishes, leaving me deflated and drained. I drag a hand through my hair, then look at the mountain of tasks that just got dumped in my lap.

Something about Lucas’s demeanor said he expects me to fail…and fail badly. I’d rather drink hemlock. This is just a lark for him, but it’s my life.

Firming my jaw, I get up and march toward my desk. I have work to do.